Ormondian Contributors


Outside the Bubble

Posted by | Ormondian, Review | No Comments

So it’s getting to that time of semester: you envisaged having explored Melbourne by now, but then Ormond happened. Why not set aside a day this week to test my template for a downtown frolic?

Bikes make everything more fun, so get hold of one if you can. I recommend some kind of windcheater as well; even if it doesn’t seem too cold out, it will when the air’s rushing straight through your sleeves. Melbourne winter hss got bite, and it’s coming, so be prepared. Read More

SCR Contributions

Posted by | Briefing, Ormondian | No Comments

Dirk Den Hartog


What is your current location?

The Fellow’s Flat on the second floor of McCaughey.

What is your current job?

I retired in 2005 from my Senior Lectureship at Victoria University, having been there for about thirty years, with some time lecturing at Latrobe, and before that tutoring at Melbourne. So now I just tutor at Ormond across a number of areas, though organising Arts events at Ormond puts that ‘just’ into inverted commas somewhat. Read More

Women in Theatre

Posted by | Opinion, Ormondian | No Comments

“Good work David. You were emotionally connected during that scene, well done. But Lee, have you had a boob job recently?”

This uncomfortably lecherous comment was delivered to me a year ago at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art, one of the largest drama schools in the United Kingdom. Pervy? Inappropriate? Retchworthy? Absolutely. Read More


BRCs with Tommy Walsh

Posted by | Lighthearted, Ormondian | No Comments

Anyway, don’t know what these mugs have been talkin about in the rest of this bloody mag (I usually just look at the pics) but fair dinkum it’s time for a brc (bloody ripper call for the uninitiated) with yours truly, Tommy Walsh. It’s the first one for the year, so ya know it’ll be an ac (absolute corker for youse trinity bastards out there). So me an’ me mates often hang out in the JCR, bloody beautiful place, and chatting about all sorts of stuff, sure as Phil loves ‘Rattle’. Read More

AFL Rd 1 - Essendon v Western Bulldogs

Trust, Truth, and Traditional Medicine

Posted by | Opinion, Ormondian | No Comments

By now, most of you will have heard that Essendon legend James Hird has been accused of using illegal, performance-enhancing drugs while playing in the Australian Football League. He insists that, while he was injected at various points during his career, he believed the injections to be harmless amino acids, and was never aware that they were not allowed by the sport. Read More

Our New GC members

Posted by | Briefing, Ormondian | No Comments

Scout Boxall

Scout Boxall is the Female Fresher Rep for 2013. When not chairing OCERC meetings, she may be found sealing letters to Stephen Fry inside coke bottles and sending them to the Motherland. She may seem like the quintessential indie gal, but to pigeonhole her would be a mistake. Read More

Dear Major Australian Political Parties

Posted by | Opinion, Ormondian | No Comments

Dear Major Australian Political Parties (MAPP),


We’re through.


It’s not me. It’s you. You want to treat me like an idiot, like someone who can’t string more than three sentences together? I’m not going to put up with it anymore. You won’t put out. You’re not consistent. I know you have ideas, but you’re not really sure what they are. The other side has no idea what in God’s name it’s doing. Instead, you’re scared; crying in the corner when no-one’s looking. Please, perhaps you need psychotherapy of some sort? Just make up your mind what you want and stick to it. Read More

Past, Present, Future

Posted by | Briefing, Ormondian | No Comments

The Ormondian team thought it prudent that we document the progress made by some of our older students, perhaps showing us what they learnt (or didn’t learn) over the course of their time here. This process was started when they were wee Freshers. We used our powerful and convenient time machine to travel a few years into the future to see what’s in store for these lucky few. Here are the results. Read More


A Beginners Guide to Perth Lingo

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As you may have noticed, the current fresher cohort contains a plethora of students from the Wild, Wild West. While on the whole, we Perth people (Perthians? Perthenese?) are a well-meaning bunch, our strange customs have incited resistance to this alarming diaspora. At an underground nativist rally in the JCR, one second year was quoted as saying “they took our jerbs!”

To live in harmony and allow for the free flow of ideas between two vastly different cultures, here is a glossary of terms that haven’t quite made it across the Nullabor: Read More